I’ve been married for 19 years and a mom for almost 16 years. It’s been the most amazing season. It’s cliche but oh so true… “these are the days”.
This season right now is particularly interesting though. We’re not totally wrangling little ones anymore. I remember the days of park days, playdates and taking strollers and pack n plays everywhere. But we’re not fully in the teen years where we are prepping, launching and preparing for life as empty nesters. We’re in BOTH!
Raising kids from toddlers to teens is hard. Preparing for potty training and teaching our teenager to drive is hard. Tutoring 10th graders is hard. Maintaining a home is hard. Nurturing a marriage is hard. Taking care of ourselves is hard. You are all out there with me. Very little of what we all do is easy. It’s all hard! It can be overwhelming. So what now?
The other day, I had a moment where I got down on myself and felt discouraged. It was a hard day of schooling and parenting, I’m not taking care of myself, and the house was a disaster. I just felt like I was failing not just in one area, but in most areas! I could not think of one area where I felt like, “I got this.” Have you been there?
I’m generally a pretty positive person. A “don’t sweat the small stuff” kind of person. And I’ve heard it all before just like you. “You can’t do it all. You are enough. There’s no such thing as super mom. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
And yet, I got caught in it too!
So a reminder to us all… We don’t need to be super. It gets to all of us.
On the average day, most of us probably have moments and areas where we feel like we’re slaying it and many areas where we’re not. That’s normal! That’s where our minds should stay. It’s so important to guard our hearts and minds. Comparison is the thief of joy. So true.
So here’s my encouragement: It’s ok to just be ok. We were simply not made to do it all! Not me and not you. We all should feel the freedom to fail at something!! When we’re not failing, we’re not growing.
Each of us are created with unique gifts. We function best when we can tap into the best parts of who we are. Community is built when we can lean on others, when we can learn from the strengths of others.
For me, I’m very visual. I have a good sense of scale, color, pattern and space and I love to create. I love to be around kids. I don’t have to work hard at those things. But I wish had the spunk of an Ennegram 8 and the heart of an Enneagram 2! I’m not a great cook and I don’t naturally enjoy cleaning. I’m a procrastinator. I’d love to be more disciplined. I love my kids but can be too idealistic. I’d love to be more adventurous. Those areas require extra work for me. I get inspired by people who are different from me!
Let’s celebrate when we are thriving and accept when we are surviving. The thriving, surviving and everything in between is all part of creating our story. I’m pretty average at many things, and that’s ok. I’m not a Super Mom. I was never meant to be.